If he were his old self, he wouldn’t have even hesitated over the issue of telling others what had happened between them. On the grounds that it was a sin he had to repay to Yeehyeon, and that other people had nothing to do with it.
He had no intention of grabbing everyone he met and rattling on about it like a self-introduction. But there were definitely people who had the right to know about his cowardly side. To confess that, he also had to reveal the heavy secret of being Ghost. Without admitting those two things, there was no way to explain half the meaning the ring held.
[For now, that topic… let’s talk about it in detail when you get here. I’ll think about it more, too.]
In the process of confessing the fact of the Changing, the disclosure of Yeehyeon’s omega-fication and its reason was inevitable, so Yeehyeon’s wishes had to take precedence over anything else. It wasn’t a matter that could be solved simply by diligently playing the role of a ‘repenting sinner’—baring his true self to his acquaintances and meekly accepting whatever decision they made about it.
[Um… but.]
Liu listened to Yeehyeon’s rare attempt to change the subject and brought the wine glass to his lips.
[The number of times you masturbate… I am curious.]
Liu’s lips, which had just been swallowing wine, urgently pushed the glass away. Thanks to his quick reflexes in pulling his chair back, he managed to avoid getting a wine stain on his jeans, but he did spill a few drops on the floor.
Lately, Yeehyeon had a habit of surprising Liu with unexpected remarks. Even where the influence of his pheromones couldn’t reach, this bolder side of Yeehyeon was a new sensation, but come to think of it, nearly two years had passed since they first met. Yeehyeon had aged by that much time, and there was no way he would remain the type to blush at his partner’s lead forever. Besides, while his original personality was introverted, it was far from being dishonest or coy.
[I hope you don’t keep it a secret.]
To Liu, who had returned to his seat after wiping the wine from the floor with a tissue, Yeehyeon’s face, driving the point home once more, was hard to read for any typical seductive expression, but Liu could sense his shyness and his effort to be bold.
Perhaps Yeehyeon was deliberately mustering up more courage, not wanting to fill this time with a heavy topic. At times like this, he was so beautiful it was baffling.
“Ah… if that topic comes up, this call is going to be quite long today.”
At Liu’s bluff, Yeehyeon’s smile deepened.
“I’ll just tell you this for now—lately, when I masturbate, I feel like I could cum just by looking at my left hand.”
Liu gazed intently at Yeehyeon’s face on the screen and bit his lower lip. His rapidly beating pulse wanted to run to him.
Liu with his wine, and Yeehyeon with a beverage in a mug presumed to be coffee, simply stared at each other for a moment. Conscious of the tension and desire pooling between them across the vast distance, Liu refilled his glass, which had already become empty.
As if Yeehyeon were by his side, as if he could reach out and touch him by carefully closing the distance, the blood in his body was turning sweet, trying to create an atmosphere for skinship. He wanted to go to him, to caress his cheek, to convey the feeling that he wanted to kiss him.
He wasn’t so naive as to not know what this moment of silence, after finally connecting on a call, meant.
Quietly, but clearly, Yeehyeon conveyed that he was no different from Liu. Staring intensely at him, Liu caressed the ring and his lips parted.
“I want to smell your pheromones.”
[Me too….]
Staring ardently at Yeehyeon, who spoke his honest feelings despite his hesitation, Liu let his posture collapse more loosely, resting his elbow on the armrest.
If he were by his side right now, he would calmly tell Yeehyeon how he would kiss him, how he would take him to bed, how he would undress him, and what kind of caresses he wanted to give him. In a monotone, low voice, while fiddling with his lips with his fingers, as if talking about the latest serious news.
Yeehyeon listened to Liu’s story with a seemingly troubled expression, occasionally lowering his eyes, gnawing on his lip, or gripping and releasing the innocent mug. A thick cloud of pheromones was surely wafting from his restless body.
Goldens weren’t just excellent at defending against pheromones. They could also release powerful pheromones capable of breaking down an opponent’s defenses. But even the pheromones emitted by the most superior Golden Alpha and Golden Omega toward each other would not match the pull between Yeehyeon and himself. Liu was certain of it.
Whether it was the pull between Ghost and Diamond Dust, or if it was based on their love for each other, or a simultaneous effect of both, he didn’t know, but even now, with Yeehyeon not by his side, he could clearly feel his own pheromones irregularly breaking through his control. It would be no different for Yeehyeon.
The distance of about 9,000 kilometers was simply cruel for two young bodies that craved each other madly. Just from a few lewd words exchanged with Yeehyeon, just from recalling the scent of his pheromones, his alpha was reacting inside his jeans.
“Should we go to the room?”
[…….]
Feeling a sticky viscosity seep into his husky voice, Liu wet his lips with his tongue.
“Lie down in bed, and I’ll call you back on my phone?”
[…….]
On the screen, Yeehyeon, painfully twisting his red lower lip with his fingers, slowly nodded.
Leaving the laptop and wine as they were, Liu got up and moved to the bedroom. From past experience, he knew the call would be long, so he moved a bottle of water, cigarettes, and a portable battery to the bedside table. He dimmed the indirect lighting and took off his jeans, draping them over the sofa. He paid as much attention to the mood as he would when preparing for an actual night with Yeehyeon.
A dry laugh escaped him at the sight of himself preparing to enjoy a sort of video phone sex with his distant lover, but if not for this, he would have checked in for a flight to Paris every weekend like before. Even if Yeehyeon scolded him, even if an angry Yeehyeon treated him coldly, he probably wouldn’t have been able to bear it. How on earth did people manage long-distance relationships in the days before video calls?
He sat leaning against the headboard with his legs stretched out, turned on the camera, and checked his appearance. He imagined Yeehyeon at the same time, burrowing into his own bed in apartment 601 with anticipation for the secret date to follow, and initiated the call.
After a brief wait, the screen showing his own face shrank and moved to the top right corner, replaced by Yeehyeon’s face. In the meantime, Yeehyeon had also moved from his table to his bed.
As if by mutual agreement, the main lights were off in the background on the screen, and a soft bedside lamp was on. Liu rubbed the corner of his mouth and chuckled.
“Ah… our intentions are so blatant.”
He couldn’t take his eyes off Yeehyeon, who was smiling silently with his lips pressed together. Just looking at his smile made his pheromones run wild. Liu, with his knees up, rested the arm holding the phone on his loosely spread legs.
“Hm? What’s this… did you change clothes?”
He thought he saw the collar of a white shirt peeking out from around the neck of Yeehyeon, who had been wearing a long-sleeved striped t-shirt with the sleeves rolled up a couple of times.
[Your shirt… I borrowed it for a bit.]
“Push the camera back a little. Let me see it properly.”
While saying what did it matter, Yeehyeon could hardly look directly into the camera lens. Only after several more pleas did he pretend to give in and extend his arm to show his upper body.
Liu couldn’t hide his smile and rubbed his entire lower face with a large hand. What Yeehyeon was wearing was definitely his shirt. It was one of the spare clothes he kept in the closet of apartment 601.
[If I wear this… it feels a little like we’re together….]
Yeehyeon said it like an excuse, but there were also sweaters and t-shirts in the closet that would have been more comfortable to wear in bed. If he wanted to feel like they were together by wearing his clothes, it didn’t have to be an uncomfortable shirt. The impulse to ask a mischievous question and see Yeehyeon flustered arose, but he swallowed it down with a dry gulp.
The fact that Yeehyeon, just like him who had spent over 30 minutes choosing an outfit before their video call date, was also conscious of his own appearance in his eyes made him seem all the more lovable.
Yeehyeon, who had it on with the top two buttons undone, pulled the loose collar of the shirt up to cover his nose and mouth.
“It’ll only smell like detergent and fabric softener.”
He said it as if he felt no stimulation or excitement in this situation, but outside the screen, invisible to Yeehyeon, Liu slid a hand between his legs. He squeezed his rapidly hardening erection a couple of times as if to restrain it, his eyes fixed on Yeehyeon.
[It’s just… I like everything that smells like you.]
Liu couldn’t really relate to the psychology of getting excited over the sight of a lover wearing one’s own baggy shirt. He didn’t understand how one could be stimulated by such a cliché, classic seduction. But there was a reason classics were classics.
It wasn’t that he felt a protective instinct toward Yeehyeon wearing his shirt, with its ill-fitting shoulders and loose fit. It was closer to a sense of intimacy or belonging that came from sharing his possessions with his partner.
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